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I have been home for a week now and every day someone new asks, "how was your trip?" I can't seem to find the right words to answer that question. I tell them it was amazing and it was beautiful. I say how much fun I had and how much I learned about myself. I tell them about the people, the sights and the food. But I don't think that I am doing the entire experience justice by haphazardly spewing out vague statements. Then again, if I am being honest, I don't know how to truly express how my trip was, because it was and still is indescribable. You really had to be there to be able to fully grasp just how life changing three weeks in Santiago, Chile really was. I am glad to be home. I am busy. I am finishing up the school year with my 3rd graders, prepping for my summer job, and packing up the past 6 years of my life to move into a house. Bill and I bought our first house. We are putting down roots and we couldn't be more excited. I've always lead a very busy lifestyle. I've always had things to do, numerous things at one time. I work well like that. And because I am so busy, I haven't had time to really miss it. But the reality is, I do. I miss traveling and learning about an entirely different culture than my own. I miss my traveling buddies and my friends in Chile. I miss speaking Spanish, or at least attempting to. I miss walking, all over the place. I miss waking up to the mountains in the horizon. I miss not having WiFi at the tip of my fingers, forcing me to hold genuine conversations. I miss greeting every single person in the room, with a kiss on the cheek and an "hola." I miss it. I figure I have two options. 1. I can sit here and miss it. I can wish I was still there and wish that I could go back. 2. I could make moves. What's next? What great adventure does life have in store for me? Santiago, Chile was my first, but certainly not my last great adventure.
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In one of our last reflection sessions here in Santiago, Chile I was asked, “what were some of the biggest things that you are taking away from this experience?” That is kind of a loaded question. There are so many things that I am taking away, that are close to my heart, and that will always be a part of me. In just three short weeks, I have grown both professionally and personally. After being away from home for three weeks I realized just how big of a support system I have. No, this isn’t news to me. But I don’t think that I allowed myself to accept just how big it was. I was encouraged to take this trip, and after the fact, continued to be pushed to do and try new things. There were several people who followed my blog from back home, which reaffirmed for me that I did the right thing. Knowing this, I felt that I could truly enjoy myself and branch out of my comfort zone. I could let my inner child out and explore a small part of this big city. Thank you to my friends and family back at home for the amazing support, the kind words and your big hearts. I have always been that shy, reserved person. Not one to engage in conversations, try new food, or venture outside of what is known. From this experience, however, I now know that I am capable of all of those things. I completely left my bubble, my comfort zone, and it was rewarding. Perhaps the biggest and most cherished thing that I am taking away from this experience, which isn’t a thing at all, are the friendships that I have made here and the people that I have met. ESCELA allowed me to meet people from all over the world. I was able to reunite with our pen pals from Chile and spend time getting to know them. They welcomed us into their group of friends, which allowed me to meet even more friendly & loving people. Finally, I traveled with 8 strangers. Strangers who became a lifeline while abroad, who brought laughter to each and every day. Strangers who became friends. Friends that I know I will have for a lifetime.
Angela, Alexia, Emma, Chelsea, Rachel, Kelly, Christine, and Crystal -- I am not sure what I would have done without you girls these past three weeks. We laughed, we cried, we played, and we learned more about each other than I would have thought going into this trip. Our fits of laughter is something that I cherish and will certainly miss (but not for too long, seeing as though we will be getting together often!) I cannot say thank you enough for everything you’ve all done for me. Mucho Amor! Christine, Naiomi, Bastian, Marcos, Juanjo and Javiera -- You were all so beyond amazing these past three weeks. The warmth you showed us was nothing short of beautiful. Thank you for welcoming us into your city! I am very sad to leave here and leave you all. I wish that we had more time to learn from one another and to get to know each other. I cherish the time we did get to spend with each other. There is a very special place in my heart for you all! I was finally able to do what I came here to do this week…teach. Although the school that I was originally assigned to went on strike, I was able to make different arrangements so that I would not miss the opportunity to interact with elementary students and teachers. The teachers frequently go on strike here in Chile, and from my understanding, it is to fight for better pay and more planning time. I knew that schools here in Chile would differ than those in the U.S. But I am not sure that I was truly prepared for what this experience brought to me. The entrance to the school had a new addition. A notice. Telling parents that they were no longer allowed to enter the school area due to a confrontation between a parent and a teacher. This set the stage for what was to be expected these next few days. From what I was told about the population of students is that they are from low socioeconomic backgrounds. I taught in a very small public school, which was about an hour metro ride each morning. The school was almost square in shape, three buildings attached to one another with the fourth side being the gate upon which students enter and exit. In the center was a concrete slab. This is where recess occurred. No playground, just a parking lot like resemblance to run around in. There was one basketball hoop but I did not see a basketball. There were a few Ping-Pong tables that the students wheeled out and unfolded, as they took their paddles out of their own backpacks. I also saw one soccer ball. Besides that, the students were constantly running around playing tag, I think. I was told that sometimes, for physical education, the students were walked down the street to the neighborhood park/playground. The building itself was made up of concrete. There were limited heating sources, which when the sun was not out, made it pretty cold indoors. Students wore their jackets, while some even wore gloves. The few classrooms I did teach in had very minimal resources. Walls were, for the most part, bare. Students took their own materials out of their backpacks (pencils, scissors, glue, notebooks) while some had none & had to share. However, one of the classrooms did have a Smart board. I did not see it being used & there was a computer lab. I did get a chance to see a class utilize the computer lab. They were given a strip of paper with the website to go onto to practice their English. Although most students followed these directions, a handful played video games. Students entered the classroom as the bell rang with food, drinks, and cell phones out on their desks. They were conversing with one another throughout the entire class period. Up and out of their seats and either talking or fighting with each other. I couldn’t tell if they were play fighting. It didn’t look like it to me, but their teacher didn’t seem too concerned. I saw a lot of smacking, twisting of hands, pulling of hair, and biting even. The teacher attempted to give directions, but several students continued on with their own business. From my point of view, it didn’t seem as though the teachers were adequately prepared with classroom management strategies. There was limited respect given to the classroom teachers by the students. I noticed that when the supervisor came in to speak with the students, then and only then were all students silent and attentive. The only form of classroom management that I observed was when the classroom teacher said, “shh!” This however, did not improve behavior. I will recount one instance that sticks out to me, one in which I haven’t been able to shake. The students were involved in a cutting and pasting activity. One little girl simply sat there. When I went up to her and attempted to ask her to begin cutting (making scissors with my hands, since I speak little Spanish and she understands little English) her teacher told me that she had difficulty cutting and that her friend was going to do her work for her once she finished her own. I was at a loss for words. However, the teacher in me was not going to allow that to happen and my instincts kicked in. I simply took a pen, drew lines on this little girls paper to separate the pictures that needed to be cut out, providing guide lines for her, and asked her to cut. She did so, perfectly. When I showed the classroom teacher this, he responded with “well, she learned something today.” I was shocked. This little girl, 5th grade, didn’t just learn how to cut. She knew very well how to cut. All she needed was a little support and a little guidance, as all students need, to be successful in the classroom. I wonder why the classroom teacher didn’t try various strategies to help this student in particular with her assignment? My belief is that teachers need to provide all students with the necessary tools to succeed.
“The child who does not play is not a child. But the man who does not play has lost forever the much needed child who used to live inside him.” –Pablo Neruda It was fitting. His house lay just above the Pacific Ocean. Overlooking the waves playfully playing hide-and-go-seek with the sand. The boat shaped house full of trinkets and gadgets holding memories, meaning and so much love. Love he had to give and love given to him by so many others-admirers, friends, & family. Taken from this world much to soon, yet leaving behind an amazing story. Today we visited Pablo Neruda’s seaside residence in Isla Negra. For those of you who don’t know, he was a Nobel Prize winner and talented poet. The tour of his home allowed us to gain a small piece, a glimpse, into both his private and professional life. He was a modern day Little Mermaid. He was a collector of all kinds of gizmos and whats-its galore! His home here was built as if it were a ship, going on forever. Every room we entered had a different collection of bottles, ship figureheads, maps, ships in bottles, shells, art, navigation tools, crafts from many different cultures, musical instruments, and many other beautiful antiques. From my short time in his home, I know he was a beautiful man with a beautiful heart. The quote above was one that was presented to us at the very beginning of the tour and resonated with me throughout. So much so that before exiting and before returning my headset, I had to listen to it over and over again so that I could write it down word for word. Each new room I entered, I returned to that quote. I realized the importance of it and what it meant to Neruda. His things, his collections, showed his inner child. Showed his love for wonder, imagination, and creativity. As I walked down to the beach below his home, listening to the waves crash & reflecting on this amazing man, I couldn’t help but think of someone very close to me and wish he were there to experience this small piece of history alongside me. Someone who I believe will never let his inner child escape him and in return, will always keep me young at heart & for that, I am grateful. Just as Pablo Neruda had a young & playful soul, which was evident through his most prized possessions, I too am reminded each and every day by you, of the importance of not growing up too quickly, that laughter really is the best medicine and that it is okay to chase the waves. I love you. With sand covered feet and Pacific Ocean covered pantalones, we boarded the bus and headed towards Valparaiso. There we were greeted with a feast! We started off with Pisco Sours & vino, mini cheese filled empanadas, a full size empanada, fish with rice and a salad, and ended the meal with cake and some sort of minty after dinner drink that was supposedly helpful in settling the tummy. Muy delicioso! From there, we ventured around the beautiful art filled streets of the city. It was breathtaking, with so many colors and sights to see for miles. It reminded me of a little town in Saint Lucia, Soufriere, && brought me back to a blissful time. We then headed to the beach once more to watch the sun go down. Wow were the waves huge! Of course I was told by my better half just why that was. "The coastal ridge is smaller in the Pacific coast than the Atlantic coast, so bigger waves in Chile!" Always handy with useless information. The ocean is a one heck of a wonder. What else is out there?
“Someday, somewhere - anywhere, unfailingly, you'll find yourself, and that, and only that, can be the happiest or bitterest hour of your life.” ― Pablo Neruda It is my last and final week in Santiago, Chile. I am down to the last few days and I can’t help but wonder, where did the time go? I am falling more in love with this city and all is has to offer as the sun rises over the mountains each morning. The past few days were jam packed with excitement, beauty, laughter, and wonder. I got to see some of my very good friends here in Chile and meet some new ones at a BBQ over the weekend. The girls and I took a bus into the mountains, yet again, to spend the afternoon eating, talking, and dancing. We just can’t get enough of the view! This was a celebratory feast hosted by the English department at Universidad Mayor. Let me tell you, they sure know how to end the semester! Equipped with eating contests (baby food, hot peppers, dog food, seafood, garlic, etc.), singing contests and dancing contests. We ate steak, sausage && finally tried Terremoto’s! Muy bueno! Early the next morning we did something that scared me, yet was thrilling all at the same time. We wanted to get a different perspective of the mountains, so instead of hiking and trekking up…this time we took los caballos! Horseback riding in the Andes Mountains. Ah-mazing. I was able to truly take in the geography of this beautiful country…looking every which way at the mountains, the wild animals, and the local plants. For me, the closest thing to riding a horse was getting a pony ride at the local fair as a child-totally not the same thing. Patience and trust were crucial while riding my horse. I was terrified that he was going to get spooked, sense I was nervous, or simply start running. It was very difficult for me to give up all sense of control, yet it was also liberating at the same time. I already knew this but what really came through on this day was just how supportive we are towards one another. For several of us, horseback riding was a first. For all of us, horseback riding up the Andes Mountains was a first. We didn't get a crash course on just how to go about getting from point A to point B by horse. We didn't have the tools or know how to get the horse to stop and go, to turn left or right, to turn around completely when we take a wrong turn. We didn't know how to handle the heights. But what we did have, was each other. From my horse, whether I was towards the front of the group or towards the back, I could hear some of the girls helping out others, a phrase used often,"You are in control."
With all my heart I want to press pause on this rewarding experience, rewind, and start all over again. Trouble is, you think you have time... 150 39 2,200 To you and me, those are just numbers. Three random numbers with no meaning other than the amount they represent. But to the Chilean people, those numbers have a more significant meaning. They aren’t just numbers to them. They stand for something. They stand for loss, horror, sadness, and fear for the unknown. They stand for the amount of children whose lives were forever changed on September 11, 1973. 150 children were executed. 39 children were detained. 2,200 children were captured, held as prisoners and tortured. There were many more lives taken that day and in the years that followed. Not just children but parents, siblings, friends, students, politicians, and many more. To you and me, those are just numbers. But to the Chilean people, those numbers have a more significant meaning. Tuesday we visited the Museum of Memory & Human Rights. The museum is dedicated to the victims of human rights violations during a time when the country was under military control. On that September day there was a military coup. The military took over the government and overthrew the president of Chile. What followed were years of repression, torture, forced disappearance, fear and exile.
The museum was a serene place to be, one that allowed for peace and tranquility. Where we could reflect on the events that took place and pay tribute to those lives lost on that horrific day. To this day, 42 years later, they are still identifying bodies. So many questions left unanswered. I wasn’t sure what to expect before entering the museum. I had some background on the events that occurred in Chile, but maybe not enough to fully appreciate all that the museum stands for. I am at a loss for words to describe just how I felt and what was going through my mind. I went a lot longer than I thought I would before feeling totally and utterly frustrated, overwhelmed and out of my comfort zone. I finally realized that I was no longer in Buffalo anymore. I had stepped out of my protective little bubble and way outside of my element. I wish that I started learning a language as a young child and had stuck with it. Learning another language now, at 28, is just difficult!
Today was our last and final day at ESCELA with our Spanish teachers. It was our last day to interact with others from all over the world who were in the same boat as us. It was our last day that we were totally immersed in the Spanish language. We had switched teachers this week and we were no longer aloud to speak English in our class. This was both a positive and a negative. Pro-I felt as though I got more out of the experience. I really had to be focused and make sure that I was staying on task for the full 90 minutes, or else I would be lost. I was still lost, but the more engaged I was in the lesson, the better I felt. Con-I was LOST. Several times I caught myself staring at my professor with what I could only describe as a look of fear on my face. Fear of being called on and not knowing what she said or how to respond. I was uncomfortable and felt as if I were an outsider. The other students in the classroom had much more knowledge on the Spanish language. They were able to hold conversations with one another and with the teacher, but me? Nope. Midway through the week my emotions caught up with me, they got the best of me. But that is the point. That is why I am here. To feel lost. To not know what is going on, to feel overwhelmed and frustrated. This experience will only make me stronger. It will make me a stronger person and a stronger teacher. I now have a better understanding just how it feels to be the new kid at school, to be the new kid in class. To be that student who doesn’t understand, who isn’t getting it, who struggles. I now know how it feels to need a different approach, to need something more, something different to better understand. These past two weeks at ESCELA I was put into my students shoes. Those students who struggle, who need more individualized instruction, who need something more to better grasp the concept. I know how they feel and I can better help them after my experience here. I learned both what to do and what not to do…smaller steps, more realia, providing examples and non-examples, and modeling. That’s what I needed this week and that’s what I plan to be sure to provide to my students. Next week we take on elementary students. I will be teaching Spanish speaking students English. I will be able to use my experience these past two weeks at ESCELA in the classroom with the students and I couldn't be more excited and up for the challenge. Saturday: Trekking Excursion in the Andes Mountains Words cannot express how absolutely amazing the Andes Mountains are in person. The pictures honestly do not do them justice. After about an hour and a half bus ride, we finally arrived. As we got closer and closer I was like a kid on Christmas morning. My face lit up and my smile grew. I jumped out of my seat, literally, to get a better look at what our tour guide was explaining, in Spanish of course! The sights were absolutely breathtaking. Trekking in the mountains was a full day excursion, from about 8am to 8pm. We hiked up some pretty steep slopes. It was very difficult to breath at times & my body sure took a beating. The path was a mixture of rocks, dirt and a whole lot of horse droppings. Thank goodness I decided to rent a pair of boots, even though they were a size and a half too big. Another group attending classes at ESCELA accompanied the 9 of us and they were in much better shape then the rest of us. I thought I was in shape, but wow was I wrong! This was a whole different type of physical activity. I couldn’t stop taking pictures, as you can see from the 100-some photos above. I took several breaks to take in the sites and capture the moment in a photo. But as soon as I did that, the group was wayyyyy ahead of me. At times I could no longer see the group in front of me or the group behind me & I was just completely surrounded by mountains, volcanoes and lagoons. I was on my own. It was incredibly peaceful. The closer we got to the end of the trail & the higher up we went, the weather changed. The sun was shinning but it got much colder & even started to snow!! If you know me at all, you know just how excited I was when the snow began to fall. At one point I even picked up a small handful of snow and threw a snowball. The various bodies of water that we hiked past were frozen over and the snow was sticking to the ground below my feet. At the end of the trail, we hunkered down and just sat there taking it all in and appreciating all that this place had to offer. It was so surreal and so serene. I couldn’t help but wish, at that moment, that my friends & family were there to experience this with me, as well as, wonder. I have been such a homebody for all of my life that I wonder what else I am missing? ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Sunday: Free Day My very good friend in Chile, Christine, and her boyfriend took us ladies to a fantastic Italian restaurant for lunch. As soon as I mentioned pasta, she immediately said that we had to go to this specific place. That it had the best pasta. Boy was she right! The plates were extremely large and extremely delicious. The 8 of us literally couldn’t make a dent in our meals, yet Christine and her boyfriend cleaned theirs! She said that they have been “trained” to be able to eat the way they do. Our stomachs just couldn’t keep up today! Thank goodness for to-go containers! Once lunch ended, us chicas decided to explore Providencia. We found a nice park-like area with a fountain view to lounge around in. We found some grass in the sun to relax on and caught up with one another. Once the sun went down, however, it got a little chilly so we began our exploration once more. What better way to warm up than with some gelato! Yummy. I think that as each day comes, we get a little bit closer. We laugh, A LOT. Not a small giggle, a true “my abs hurt” laugh. Not that I am thinking about leaving already, but I know that I am going to leave with some very close friends & that our adventures will not end here in Chile.
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AuthorMy name is Natalie and I am a graduate student at Buffalo State College in the special education program. I have been given this amazing opportunity to really grow not only as a student, but as a teacher and a person. Through this experience my hope is that I get to know myself better as an individual; develop a deeper understanding of the Chilean geography, culture and language; and gain a different perspective on the possibilities within the classroom. I hope that you follow me on this journey and learn right alongside me. ArchivesCategories |